Monday, October 05, 2009

Praise Alla.

Some women just have bitchy faces. Despite anything they try to think, do, or say, their visages are frozen in a permanent scowl with enough stink eye to waft across any crowded room and make everyone who looks directly upon it think, "What are you staring at? What? Bitch!" For most women the benefits of a bitchface are slim to none, with most of the fallout measured in failed social interactions. But, if you happen to be slim (and tall and gorgeous) your bitchface may be your key to stardom and financial success!

Take for instance the Ukrainian modelina Alla Kostromicheva. The bitch is everywhere this season! And her scowl is super. It's something in the placement of her eyebrows.

They are super low and super scowly. It's kind of amazing, right? Wait, I found a picture of her where she doesn't look snarly...

Ok, in all seriousness the girls seems sweet as pie--as long as she's talking. Here's a video clip of her backstage last season at Max Mara.

So, what have we learned? If you have a bitchface, try to use it to your advantage by being a supermodel. If you see someone with a bitchface, at least try to talk to them and see if it's just the eyebrows they were born with. Approach with caution, but approach nonetheless. It's a good deed.

Photos from

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